“I’m selling my horse because I’m holding him back”
you horse doesn’t know or care that you’re holding him back
"We’re preparing you for the real world"
I don’t meant to alarm you but
the real world has calculators
College kids literally don’t care about walking in the way of cars at school because we’re like “hit me i don’t care pay my tuition.”
"Hit me my thesis is due in 12 hours and I haven’t started it"
"Hit me I have a final in an hour and I didn’t study"
"Hit me I’ve been on a 24 hour drinking binge and I’m invincible"
"Hit me. You’re a university vehicle and I’ll get free tuition."
"Hit me I feel like a failure anyway"
It is illegal for women to go topless in most cities, yet you can buy a magazine of a woman without her top on at any 7-11 store. So, you can sell breasts, but you cannot wear breasts, in America.
when you and ya bestfriend say something at the exact same time
- iPhone user: I'm so excited to get the iPhone 6
- Android user: Why do people with iPhones think they're so much better than everyone else
- iPhone user: I just like this pho-
- Android user: The Samsung Anus5000 had that screen *snort* like 2 years ago! *glomping noise* How are you enjoying 2012 you mindless sheeple?? *uses inhaler to suppress incoming asthma attack*